I will be one of the first to admit that I’m not as rational and straight-thinking as the average human being should be. My mind is constantly racing and it’s a struggle for most people to keep up. The ones that do keep up only do so because they aren’t so normal themselves. My old boss used to insist that I was too hard on myself, advice which to all intents and purposes always fell on deaf ears. Who am I? Well, depends on when you ask me. I’m constantly evolving which means that something that was perfectly normal yesterday couldtoday-become a taboo. The ones that know me just let me ride-I usually come full circle once all the steam has been let out of my sail.lol.
It’s a Friday afternoon-I’m sitting here-waiting until 3.20 so I can get in a cab and head for the airport. I’m headed for Geneva and I just can’t wait to get on that plane! The last month or so has been especially difficult as far as I’m concerned and I’m glad that there’s finally some light at my end of the tunnel. Funny how quickly, the future becomes your past. In less than a 100 hours, Geneva will struggle for a place in my memory banks. As hard as it may seem, I will have to learn to also live for today because that’s really what reinforces my history and will propel my future.
One of the most amazing things about writing is the freedom that you feel when you flirt with words and place hide and seek with the phrases that match the way you feel at the precise time and place. Often, you read back and you can’t believe how well you captured that moment especially since you’ve moved well on since then.
As another year draws to an end, I really wonder what the years to come will hold. I keep asking God to wrap me with the Spirit of Wisdom because simple things only get more complex as we get older. I’m amazed how I manage to significantly complicate things that should have been left mindless and as simple as they were intended to be. All the shouldas, couldas, wouldas of the next year. How I will I make them count??
I probably will speak (constantly) to fewer people than I do this year because that’s just how the curve progresses. And I think, in many ways, that’s a positive. I probably will do much more travelling than I did this year and try make my money work more for me. Next year’s birthday will be a milestone and I intend to make it count..TO Me.lol.Will I have a boyfriend next year? Will I still love my job next year? Will I remain in Europe next year? The jury is out and we’ll have to be patient with the verdict because I don’t know. But with every day that passes, I get closer to uncovering these answers, so every day does count..I know what I’d like the answers to some of these questions to be but who knows what will happen tomorrow to change that.
I’m grateful for to all those that have stuck with me this far and I pray that tomorrow only brings us closer than yesterday. After all said and done, God is an artist and our lives are His masterpieces-we may not get it while he’s painting, but in hindsight, everything makes perfect sense.